26 May 2017

life lately.

i look at the calendar and it's the coda of may and i cannot believe it but also i can. time is marching right on by, a drumbeat of work days and weekends, tuesday soccer and sunday suppers.

we are:

watching the handmaid's tale and last week tonight and veep. reading hillbilly elegy (him) and the new yorker every week and joan didion everything, still (me). listening to ruth etting and daydreaming of a porch sit. listening to jonsi & alex and daydreaming of travel. making smoothies with avocado and spinach and strawberries and almond milk. hanging wedding photographs and ephemera. commuting to hoboken (him) and washington square (me). counting down the days until our long weekend guests arrive (down to hours now!). making soup with chickpeas and chicken. discussing forest schools and slightly bigger apartments and meaning & themes unearthed by the on being podcast. treasuring time and treasuring each other.

23 May 2017

be still & find the joy.

thankful for who i married, thankful to look out my window and see hundred old brownstones, thankful to have flights booked to see my family in three weeks, thankful for music, thankful for friends who never let miles matter.

i've started this little ritual with myself: while my darling husband dreams and dreams, i rise with the songbirds at the six o'clock hour and put the coffee on and perch in my window and write and write. i write in whatever way feeds me that particular morning. the point is: noticing my life. noticing the things that make me feel as though god is aware of me. noticing my blessings. counting them. calling them by name.

22 May 2017


husband has been away on a golf trip in the poconos and i've had myself a weekend. i brunched with a friend at root & bone over chicken and waffles and doughtnuts and avocado toast. i nosed through tee shirts at madewell and brought home two. i wrote a letter to a friend. i chatted with my papa for thirty blocks. i ran errands with my mama- and brother-in-law and cuddled sweet baby ella. i wrote and i walked and i thought. i worked on our wedding album and filled a pitcher with irises and took a tub in the middle of the afternoon, clutching my paperback, fig blossom bath oil pooling on the surface in that really good way. i walked for an iced cappuccino at the counter of that cafe we adore on 83rd street. i ran into a friend on the sidewalk and we made plans for this week and i loved new york so deeply in that moment for that very reason -- eight million people, and you run into just the one you've been thinking of right there on columbus avenue.

when husband walked in the door, it was to windows thrown open and louis & ella playing loud and sunday's soup on early. we took an after supper walk across the neighborhood for milkshakes and we crawled into bed early, so early that twilight was still long and blue, and though it wasn't warm, not even a little bit, summer did indeed seem near.

18 May 2017


-- walking slow in central park, the middle of may, the six o'clock sun tumbling through the trees and we were newlyweds, just six months married.

16 May 2017


christopher's parents hosted the lot of us and it was bare feet and sunshowers, peonies on the table and ribs on the grill. i made grandma georgia's pineapple cake. christopher made guacamole. bob dylan filled our ears. we roared over stories from before christopher's parents were married. when it got cold, we lit a fire and curled into knit blankets with paperbacks and sleepy eyes -- odd behavior for the middle of may, but a feast for our spirits nonetheless. we delighted in ella, all dimples and cheeks, wondering what we used to talk about before there was a babe in the family. we gave thanks to and for the mamas. such big, hard, bright work they do.

10 May 2017

an amble down ninth street at the noon hour in may.

in praise of --

garden apartments
windows wide open
climbing ivy
wooden doorways
arched doorways
bursting window boxes
mail delivered on foot
swinging iron gates
buildings with names